On My Way

Here we are: Week three on my meds, and now on vacation until after Canada Day Weekend. No more dizziness (YAY!), just some fatigue that will hopefully work itself out over the next little while. I am starting to become more present. There is less disassociation. I can see NOW that I really should have …

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Upgrading My Toolbox (Because Suffering is NOT an Option For Me)

Today I was able to see my doctor. I am very lucky, because I called this morning and got in this afternoon. I know I've been off kilter for quite some time now (months really) and I've been at the edge of the rabbit hole for about the same amount of time. I had been …

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Amy’s Anxiety and The Tub

(Oh how I wish this post was about ice cream.....) May 9, 2018: So, Here I am awake at 11:27pm. You’re like...uhhhhh, and? Well, I am usually in extreme super sleep right now, because sleep and I are tight.  We have a very good relationship.  Amy + Sleep = BFFs. But NOT TONIGHT. (Backstory:  We …

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Am I Doing This Wrong?

It's funny how quickly self reflection turns into some extreme self criticism. Struggling to take expectations off of oneself is not easy. There is an internal daily struggle: Why can't I figure this out? Why am I so stuck? I'll never figure this out. I'm not capable of *insert thing here*. I'm not smart enough. …

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So Many Things

When I am coming out of a depressive episode, it's like a slow sunrise after an overnight storm. I am never sure how long I'll have before the next descent, so I am soaking in every moment I can. Saving good memories for the next fog filled vortex. I've been running with my BRF Kara …

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Looking Out From The In

It's been a rough go these past few months. Swimming upstream was taking its toll. The daily struggle of getting out of bed was hard, and my life mojo was low. Having a moment in each and every day to sit and be present with myself caused me to face some of my demons head …

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What I am Learning

I started my yoga journey to slowly get my body back to some fluid movement after beating it up for many years with my running. I have been learning a lot, about my body and about myself. I am becoming more present (although on my not so good days this can still be a struggle) …

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